.........

nobody will like to talk to negative person

including myself

i always remind myself that i need to be tough or strong in physically as well as mentally

but it is very hard and u need strength to achieve it

never ever express negative feeling to people around you

they won't sympathize you

they will feel that you are juz being 'BRAT' or need attention

i started to keep everything in side my heart

not willing to tell others about my issues

but end up

difficulty in breathing when all problems come together

i don know until when i need to be strong or tough

i want to have a good rest

and no worries

its that hard???

i always tell myself i can do it

and don give up

but once all problems occur in one time

it will be very tough unless there is a person who will always be there for you

i always wish there is someone that i can depend on and be there for me

but the main problem i don like to depend on people because i will feel i owe he or she

that is my principle

when i feel tired ..i will tell myself that i not tired

all i need is to smile but the smile is fake

i even talk craps in order to make myself t0 forget

I know i should leave it to god

God will help me to settle everything

but i do not want to ask him for a favour for everyday and every minute even second.